CrunchBang - Code, Design & GNU/Linux

moosplash — for all Intrepid cow lovers

The other day I received a message from Sean Hammond letting me know that moosplash, a cowsay inspired USplash theme was broken under Ubuntu Intrepid Ibex. So, I rebuilt the package against the new Usplash sources and it now works with Ubuntu Intrepid Ibex. Yay!

For anyone who missed it the first time round, it looks like this:

Not digging Flash? Then by the power of cow, view the ogg format.

As before, the download and installation instructions for Ubuntu are available on my wiki. Enjoy :)

P.S. I really should find something constructive to work on!

Closest booky wook

My blogging activities seem to have been reduced to participating in memes found on planet Ubuntu. Oh well, here goes:

Back to his apartment in Clerkenwell, a good hot shower and a takeaway sea bass in tamarind sauce from the Thai place round the corner, followed by the latest of the Miss Marple remakes on ITV.

— Relentless by Simon Kernick

How to participate in this most excellent of memes:

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open it to page 56.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions.
5. Don’t dig for your favorite book, the cool book, or the intellectual one: pick the CLOSEST.

Swimming upstream

Roughly three weeks ago I decided to take a little swim upstream. I swam for a few hours and found Sid. I played with Sid for a day or two and I had a great time. However, even though Sid had grown on me, I could not help but feel there was something unstable about our new relationship. I did not experience any craziness first-hand, it was more of a gut feeling that things could go screwy at any time. Having just swam from a place where things tend to get somewhat turbulent every six months, I was keen to find something new, yet stable enough to build a future on. The idea of a future with Sid was really beginning to freak me out, so I decided I had probably swum a little too far.

I said a fond farewell to Sid and started floating back downstream. I was not floating for long when I came across Lenny. For a brief moment I thought I must have been caught in an underwater current and been dragged back upstream, Lenny looked and behaved in a near identical manner to Sid, though Lenny lacked the unstable aura. Lenny and I have been getting along really well since. Sure, I would probably still classify our relationship as being in "testing", still, I do not think it will be too long before it can be reclassified as being truly "stable". I am looking forward to it.

24 hours with t' Intrepid Alpha

Ayeterday I installed t' latest Alpha o' Ubuntu, Intrepid Ibex. I installed t' alpha on 2 different machines and experienced mixed results.

T' first machine I installed it on was me notebook. I really only use me notebook for browsin' t' web and communicatin', I do not use it for any mission critical activities, so I be easy when it comes t' usin' t' machine for testin' purposes. Me notebook, an Acer Extensa 4220, took t' installation flawlessly, apart from t' wireless, which has never worked. I have only been usin' t' installation for about 24 hours, but I be impressed with what I have seen so far.

In fact, I was so impressed with me notebook installation, I decided t' install t' alpha on me desktop, an old Compaq Evo. As with me notebook, I rarely use me desktop for anythin' important and so I be fairly easy when it comes t' usin' it for testin'. This time I was not so impressed, t' installation worked fine, but after performin' an apt-get update/upgrade, t' system decided it not want t' play ball and started t' experience some xorg issues. I have reported these issues and will continue t' attempt a fix.

So, 2 installations o' Intrepid on 2 different machines in 1 day. 1 installation rocks. 1 installation blows. It be all good fun.

By t' way, sorry for me silly pirate speak :)

A Network of Ubuntu Muppets, Part 2

I have not posted on my blog for a while, I guess I have broken the habit. Luckily, as if just to help me ease back into this blog, there is currently a meme spreading from planet to planet.

I actually posted about my computer naming theme last October, see "A Network of Ubuntu Muppets". I am still using the same naming theme, only I now have 3 more muppets on the network; beaker, fozziebear and muppy. My network of Ubuntu muppets is growing.

Bah.

moosplash — for all the cow lovers…

…I give to you a cowsay inspired USplash theme.

Not digging Flash? Then by the power of cow, view the ogg format.

Download and installation instructions for Ubuntu are available on my wiki. Enjoy :)

TerminatorToo

The Terminator is great. Terminator 2 is arguable greater. This Terminator is also great, as is this Terminator, probably, although I have never tried it.

2 projects, 1 name, an annoying issue which I would not wish on anyone. Unfortunately though, for Chris Jones of this Terminator project, it is an issue; an annoying issue which is probably compounded due to the fact that the other Terminator project is also a terminal emulator.

I feel for Chris as he is faced with 2 options, leave the name as is [and forever field questions from muppets like myself], or, change the project name. To be honest, I would not imagine either option is overly appealing; still, if I were to put myself in Chris' shoes, I think I would be inclined to change the name sooner, rather than later. I would do it for the following reasons:

• Respect for what came before, after all, is it not the Ubuntu way?
• Firebirdfox did it, although ultimately the project failed.
• My mum's mum's mum used to say, "A change is as good as a rest."

Having now committed to letting Chris know what to do, it would be remiss of me to spout all this nonsense without coming up a serious contender for a suitably catchy alternative name. So, I was thinking, what about TerminatorToo? Disregarding the silly pun, it would have the advantage of users not having to mentally relearn keystrokes when typing into any tab-completion enabled environments. Just a thought.

Finally, all testiculating aside, I am interested to know what you would do if you found yourself in this situation? Of course, I am speculating, but I think Chris would be interested too.

Contractions, Waffle, Mrs Briggs & Data

For the last month or so I've I have been attempting to eliminate contractions from my blog posts. Initially I found the process quite difficult and I'd I would often find myself struggling with basic English. One word which troubled me was, "cannot", which for a while at least, existed in my head as two separate words; I can't can not cannot imagine why? Anyhow, I think I'm I am finally beginning to get the hang of it.

I'm I am not entirely sure why I decided to stop using contractions; maybe it's it has got something to do with my need to experiment? Or, maybe I'd I had previously read somewhere that contractions cause issues with non-human translation services. Either way, I'm I am quite enjoying the experience, although I fear that it doesn't does not aid the flow of my written gibberish.

While I'm I am on the subject of my poorly scribed waffle, it's it has got to be said that writing doesn't does not come naturally to me. The reason my writing isn't is not often easy to read isn't is not entirely due to my recent sans-contraction experiment, no, I believe it's it has more to do with Mrs Briggs, who was both my secondary school English teacher and the biggest distraction throughout my secondary education. Actually, that's that is not completely true, the distractions were her long legs, short skirts and fancy knickers [don't do not ask]; which in my humble opinion, isn't is not suitable attire for a secondary school English teacher. Maybe I should've should have said something at the time? Thinking about it now, I'm I am glad I didn't did not say anything because I'm I am sure she'd've she would have flipped out; besides, no normal hormonal teenage boy is going to complain about such things.

Anyway, back to the subject of contractions; if you're you are wondering how all this relates to Data, well, it's it is a known fact that Data's Data has got issues with verbal contractions in ordinary speech, which is amusing when you consider he's he has got a total linear computational speed rated at sixty trillion operations per second, yet he can't can not cannot say, "can't". Silly android.

P.S. I thought it'd it would be fun to write like this, but to be honest, 'tisn't it is not. 'tisn't It is not going to happen again ;-)

Meme: When zombies attack

I could not resist this meme, it features zombies!

You are in a mall when zombies attack. You have:

1. One weapon
2. One song blasting on the speakers
3. One famous person to fight along side you.

1. Excalibur; because it never runs out of ammunition.
2. Where's your head at - Basement Jaxx.
3. Uma Thurman; because two swords are better than one ;)

Your turn.

Planet GNOME Goodness

Some people, I will not name names, complain about non GNOME related posts appearing on Planet GNOME. For the record, I am not one of those people. I enjoy reading random posts written by the GNOME hackers. As an example, read this one, an interesting and witty post containing such gems as…

Dispose of the males. They don't have ovaries. Local laws may make it awkward for you to release animals from laboratory environments, so dump them into a bottle of ethanol. They'll probably die happy, to the extent that fruitflies can really be happy.

and…

Slowly move the tweezers apart. If you are lucky, the abdomen will split and you'll start pulling out internal organs. If you're unlucky, the head will come off.

Eew! :D

Tribal Wars & Baroness Becky

Foreword: I have to admit that I was somewhat sceptical when Gouki introduced me to Tribal Wars. It's easy to dismiss such games as both frivolous and childish. Since experiencing the game for myself, I can now see the attraction. Tribal Wars has been my first introduction to a MMOG and while I may not be the best of players, I find the in-world politics and fight for survival fascinating. It's interesting to witness how the players, tribes and tactics evolve over time. This post is a short commentary on my Tribal Wars history to date.

As has become usual over the last few months, last night both Becky and I were sat with our laptops relaxing in the lounge. I was chatting and on IRC and Becky was playing Tribal Wars. Becky tends to chunter when she plays, it amuses me no end. Becky started playing in November last year, about the same time that I started. She's a far better player than I'll ever be and her points total is scary big.

When we started playing we both joined up as members of the Ubunteros tribe. It was a good tribe and we both gained points and made our way up the rankings. Becky, being the total megalomaniac that she is, managed to become one of the top players in the tribe [I forget her exact position, but I'm sure she'll fill me in.] Meanwhile, I languished around mid-table, this was mainly due to the fact that I wasn't aggressive enough, I just didn't expand into new territories with enough speed — I'm sure the Ubuntu Code of Conduct and Tribal Wars don't mix too well!

Anyhow, last month I was subjected to an unprovoked attack by a neighbouring player. It was a fairly even fight and neither of us emerged from it too well; I lost a large number of defensive troops and my aggressor lost all of his attack units. The battle left my small number of villages in vulnerable state and I looked for support from the UBU tribe. It was at this point that I realised the UBU tribe was not in any position to provide the support I needed. The tribe was far too scattered and the nearest tribe members were many hours away. Meanwhile I had several hostile tribes knocking on my door. Survival instinct took over and I had no option but to leave my beloved UBU tribe. I joined the Brotherhood Of BaD, the strongest and most powerful tribe on my continent.

Not long after my departure from UBU, Becky also defected and joined a stronger tribe. She is now joint leader of her new tribe and holds a baronial title no less! She continues to wreak havoc in World 9 and I truly pity any player unlucky enough to attract her attention. Through hard work and total dedication [is she an addict?] she has positioned herself well within the Tribal Wars food chain, it'll take a rather large predator to take her down.

Anyway, last night while discussing the game with my Baroness [Becky, have I told you lately how much you rock!] I learned that the UBU tribe have joined forces with the Brotherhood Of BaD. They are now known as UBUBAD. Obviously I was delighted to hear this and would like to take this opportunity to welcome the Ubunteros into the Brotherhood. I feel it was a wise decision to join forces, it places UBUBAD within a strong family of tribes; one that is evolving into a serious contender for World 9 domination.

As it stands now, I'm witnessing other tribes joining forces to overcome the 100 players per tribe game limitation. This means there now exists super-tribes with members numbering in the thousands. It'll be fascinating to see how this develops. I'm sure my player will be long dead before a conclusion is reached [if there is a conclusion], but I know I can count on my Baroness to keep me informed, chuntering as she goes :)

Random Ubuntu Advocacy - Elvish Version

So, Andy Loughran, AKA Eärendur of Dorthonion, has been busy translating these images into Elvish. Not wanting to upset our pointy eared friends, or the Elvish Linguistic Fellowship [I hear the E.L.F are BIG on Ubuntu!], I've uploaded Andy's translations and made them available from my file server. Thank you Andy, I think!?

The complete Elvish set can be viewed on this demo page. You can help spread the word of Ubuntu to the oldest of all common races by copying and pasting the code below into your HTML/blog template:

<script type="text/javascript" src="http://crunchbang.net/advocacy/ev/ubuntu_199_164.js">
</script>
<noscript>
<a href="http://ubuntu.com/getubuntu" title="Kaer Ubuntu!">
<img src="http://crunchbang.net/advocacy/ev/199_164_ubuntu.png" alt="Kaer Ubuntu."></a>
</noscript>

Can of worms anyone?

CommandShift3 - It's Like Hot or Not for Websites

On CommandShift3, you are presented with the screenshots of two websites side by side. If you click the screenshot of the site you think looks best, the page reloads and you start all over again. It never ends.

I'm really liking CommandShift3, which is unusual as I'm not normally a fan of such sites. I guess the subject matter, web design, has helped to endear it to me. The site is fast becoming one of my favourite places to go whenever I'm bored. The site has also made me realise that I can be as judgemental as the next person.

Anyhow, I couldn't resist submitting CrunchBang into the pool, you can see how it's performing here:
http://commandshift3.com/site/crunchbang.org

At the time of writing, CrunchBang had won 113 of 218 battles (52%), not too shabby, all things considered. Seriously though, it's just some harmless fun and I really wouldn't worry about my site's performance, not unless it started to appear here :D

I Like Monkeys

Excerpt from I Like Monkeys:

I didn't know what to do. There were 200 dead monkeys lying all over my room, on the bed, in the dresser, hanging from my bookcase. It looked like I had 200 throw rugs.

I tried to flush one down the toilet. It didn't work. It got stuck. Then I had one dead, wet monkey and 199 dead, dry monkeys.

Via Christoper Blizzard :)

Zombies in Plain English

We here at Common Craft are worried about you and your brain this Halloween. You see, it's zombie season and we want you to be prepared. To help, we made this 3 minute video that will make sure you survive, brain intact.

I've watched the video and I'm now well prepared, are you? Watch the video: Zombies in Plain English to ready yourself now!

A Network of Ubuntu Muppets

I was sat at my PC tapping away at the keyboard when I heard Becky's voice from behind, "Who's Miss Piggy?" It took me all of a nanosecond to realise what she was talking about, but several minutes to explain away my new mystery girlfriend.

As it turned out, Becky had witnessed my connection to Miss Piggy first hand. She'd seen this floating on my desktop:

I had to chuckle when I explained that I'd named the systems on my network after characters from the muppets. I then properly introduced her to misspiggy, gonzo and kermit — only for Becky to ask, "Where's Beaker?"

Soiled by a Humping Weasel

Seen today on Planet Debian:

I may be a little behind on the times here, but it was in his post that I first saw the Iceweasel logo. While it’s graphically hideous, I kept thinking, “That weasel is humping the earth. I feel soiled.”

I had to chuckle at this - nice one Aaron :)

Word of the Day: Infoporn

Information that serves no purpose and consumes valuable space in your head.

Sun Magazine is infoporn.

I try to keep my head infoporn free. I'm sure Becky would debate this! :-)

A Virtual Richard Stallman for Cowsay Hack

I'm not sure how this came about as unfortunately I wasn't there, but apparently the other night, users in the #ubuntu-uk channel had some fun with vrms. And then today it spread from the IRC channel to the mailing list.

I submitted my system output as requested [well it is Friday!] However, I did feel a little disappointed by the vrms program. Sure, it's good at what it does [actually this is debatable as it only counts packages installed with apt!?] but the output was a little boring.

Surely it would be better if RMS were to present the results himself? Enter my little hack.

Instructions for Ubuntu

1. Make sure you have both vrms and cowsay installed. You can install them using apt with the following terminal command:

sudo apt-get install vrms cowsay

2. Download my rms.cow file with the command:

wget http://crunchbang.org/misc/rms.cow

3. Move the cow file to Cowsay's cows directory with the command:

sudo mv rms.cow /usr/share/cowsay/cows/rms.cow

4. Now run the following command to have cowsay output your vrms results:

cowsay -f rms -W 60 `vrms`

5. Now marvel at the screen! It should look something like my example below:

Note: Obviously this is hours of fun, but if you get bored [surely not] you can always have RMS say something else, try the following for example:

cowsay -f rms LugRadio, bunch of freedom haters!

You digg?

Silly Variable Names

They're not big and they're not clever. So how come they keep slipping into my code?

if(!empty($bum)){
    unload($bum);
}

Note to self: stop with the silly variable names already!